that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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