I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
