meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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