last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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