I bet he comes in French.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
