the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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