white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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