the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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