Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
We are two peas in an std pod
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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