Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
