Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Randomize
