If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
