I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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