It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
