He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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