dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
