i permit you to call me
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
