i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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