have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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