you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
