Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
