i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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