Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
