i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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