the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
