i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
