can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
