all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
