Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
