he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
