After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I'm always down for nudity.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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