You can't special order awesome
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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