So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
