You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Come share oat with me in your robe
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize