I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
