on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
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