Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize
