I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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