i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
the liver wants what the liver wants
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
