make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
