Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
