He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Nobody cheats on THIS.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
