is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
