Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
