this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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