Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
