am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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