Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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