Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
