I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
