I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
